Some things don't make sense...major ramblings ahead.

There is so much death around me right now. None of it directly but around.
It makes me appreciate life more yet I am still suffering with stupid anxiety that seems to be getting worse.
I want to work more..I want more clients. I am a photographer but a business woman I am not. So this means I have no clients.
Money sucks right now so that makes me want to work more. Not too much but 4-6 clients a month that order would be wonderful right now.

T has been sick and wearing on my nerves...yes, i feel bad for him but at 3 AM I just want to sleep.
This morning went smoothly, surprised me. There were no tantrums and no whining....just goofy kids getting ready for the day.
T will miss school today. Saddens me because he only gets two days as it is.

It's a different year for sure....

Last year I made some very good friends. This year our kids are in different classes. Wy got the class that lines up up with the second graders. The other two moms line up next to each other. So today one asked me to go get coffee with her. So I did and the 2nd mom came too. It felt so good to be out with them. We were talking and come to find out the first friends MIL died Sunday night...I had no idea. We were so close last year..arg...i just feel awful. Then they start talking about all the stuff they do together in the mornings....i feel sad.
I feel sad that those two are close now and i feel like the third wheel. It used to be that the first mom and me would do everything together and the second mom would come along when she could.
It was the same way over the summer...they called once to invite me over. When i went they talked about all the stuff they had been doing all summer. I never got a call. Sure i could of called them but i wasn't doing anything. I did call a couple times to chat. I saw them once over the whole summer.....
I suppose I am just having a pity party for myself. I am sure i'll get over it.

Monday...Monday....Monday...

I am gearing up to leave for Washington this weekend. this Monday is lazy Monday so that tomorrow and Wednesday can be spent kicking butt getting the house and meals in order for Mr. Fun. This way I can come home to a clean house.

JJ doesn't like the bus very much. So I have decided that I will take her and pick her up. We did the trial run today and I can walk the boys to school, walk back home and still have her to school in time, before the bus.

Went by the preschool this morning..so much more paperwork to fill out. T is so ready to go. I found out his teacher has taught preschool for 16 years ..LOVE that!! I can't wait to meet her tomorrow and I can't wait for T to start. I was talking with the director and T was being his silly self..she said she may have a new favorite student. I giggled and said "if you only knew" . This kid is going to be the class clown. I am hoping that he loves preschool as much as I think he will.
He asked if i was going to stay with him at school and I explained I couldn't. He seemed like he accepted that answer. Maybe too easily..lol. He may be the screamer I have yet to have for preschool.

I survived the first week...YAY for friday.

Now Friday's mean something to me. Tomorrow morning I can sleep as long as my kids allow me. Of course kids bounce back quickly. Today I didn't have to wake any of them. One by one they slowly wandered out to the living room demanding breakfast before it was even time to eat.
JJ has had to ride the bus twice this week and I don't think she likes it. It makes for a much longer day and being in close proximity with other kids she finds intimidating. I have decided that I will pick her up and only have her ride the bus to school when Mr. Fun isn't able to help in any way. That is why I stay home after all.....to be there for my kids.
We have also decided that JJ won't be dancing this year. T starts preschool and that cuts into the budget heavily. She did mention playing softball through her school program. I would LOVE that.
I would have a jock princess...that would rock.

So far so good...

Everyone is enjoying their school days. There wasn't any tears either..so far. I have to take Wy to school tomorrow and I am anticipating that he will cry.
JJ is going to ride the bus tomorrow..i hope that goes well so i won't have to take her or pick her up.

I had Wy's open house tonight and at first I wasn't happy with his teacher. Tonight I left there very pleased with her and I am excited to watch him and help him grow this school year.

I am hoping that I get the same feeling as I leave G's open house.

JJ likes all her teachers. She's not too sure about her science teacher but I am sure she'll come around and learn to like him. I am hoping that algebra isn't too hard for her and her love for math doesn't suffer.

T starts on the 26th..kets hope he loves it just as much a sthe other kids loved preschool.

Middle School.......

YIKES!!!! We went to visit the middle school yesterday and I am so not ready. Her first three hours of school will be her hardest. Algebra 1-2 with the 8th graders *gulp* and then 2 hours of English honors. The school is big. We mapped out her route and hopefully she won't get lost on the first day and have friends in her classes.
What I don't understand is there are no lockers..what is that? So She has to carry her lunch with her all day and all her books for all her classes? She has 8 classes and 5 books. That is one heavy back pack to have on your back. And my kids don't eat school lunches..they are overpriced for the crap you get.

Now lets talk about the other kids I saw....eek!! Make-up, tight clothing and attitudes.....OI! Not ready for the drama. Not ready for the homework that I won't understand.

Overall... just not ready.

Touchy subject but who cares, LOL!!

I was watching some late late night talk show last night. There was a comedian on. I forget his name...I said it was late night and I should of been sleeping so I don't remember much about the details. I do remember he wasn't born here in America and hasn't been here that long. So anyways...
He said he didn't believe in God.....the silence was crazy. Then he breaks the silence with "does anyone in America ever say that?" That made me think... I rarely hear anyone say they don't believe in God. Why is that? Is it because they are afraid of what others will think? My faith is not strong. Do I believe there's a God? I like to think I do but I am a very matter of fact person. The idea of God is very comforting. The idea of heaven is heavenly. There is no actually proof that either exist. Yes, there's the bible but.......God himself didn't write it. Like this comedian said "have God give everyone a banana and then I'll believe"
I don't believe God has control over my life in anyway. I believe my actions and attitude do. I believe that if he is there he's there for comfort, that's it. He can not change the outcome of my life, only I can do that. Sure, I can pray but it's not God making me do one thing over another...it's me.
Do I want my kids to believe in God? If they want to. I want them to be happy, respectful, successful, good people. I don't believe you have to believe in a higher power to be all those things. So it's their choice to believe what they will.

I hope i didn't offend anyone..it's just me thinking out loud.

AHHHHHHH...............and some other stuff.

Oh my hell............. my head hurts.
My site is officially up
www.mdawsongallery.com
It's not 100%...still trying to find music but I am not having any luck. I want music with vocals. I want upbeat,fun yet soft music.

Now I am trying to create my blog....whole other monster. I have no clue where to start. OK, that's a lie I created the sub-domain for it. Now What?

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Our good friends came over for a BBQ last night. He has been in Alaska for the past five months. It's good to have him home. He brought over some fresh salmon he caught in Alaska . I didn't eat it because I don't like salmon but I heard it was delicious .
We ate too much, drank too much and had a great night.
We went to walk them out and there was a very strong smell. The G-man said it smelled like french fries. If only he knew it was the good stuff they call pot *teehee*
We never did figure out where it was coming from. It was strong it had to be close.

Am I tired but EXCITED

Thanks to some wonderful friends I have purchased a new site. I worked on it all day...then some wires got crossed and another photographer started adding her stuff. It was crazy...comical really.
After that all got straightened away I had to redo EVERYTHING I had done the prior 3 hours.
Crazy stuff but I am super excited to launch this site. I am waiting on an email......
so the waiting starts.....

there's your sneak peek.

Is it Monday?

Oh my HELL!! It's Monday. Days run together for me. Days right now are determined by Mr. Fun's schedule. It's either his day off or not. That's summer glorious summer for you.
Two weeks from today the mini funs go back to school. This summer flew by. We didn't do anything spectacular. No family vacation, no water parks, no museums. We did take a lot of photos. I mean SO SO SO many photos. We attended a couple baseball games,rented lots of movies which we inhaled too much junk food while watching and played with lots of bubbles.
Just some random photos that scream summertime for me. I am sad it's coming to a close.









~*Mrs.Fun*~

We are together again... and more

JJ came home yesterday. My mom took G and JJ for what was going to be a 5 day trip and it turned into a 2 week trip. She brought them back home and somehow JJ ended going back with my mom. It was supposed to be for 3 days and she ended up staying 7 days.
Now it's time to get ready for school. There's shoes to buy, schedules to get on and most importantly...no more junk food every day.
We also started chore charts with the boys. G is taking to it so well. T is still a little young to grasp it in full. Wy...what can I say about Wy..it's going to take some learning with him. Lots of tough love, I think.
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So Blu has decided to tease me longer and they extended their sale until Wednesday *sigh* So here I sit obsessing still.
This was my SP for today

So many reasons to be jumping for joy yet I am so bummed out.


~*Mrs. Fun*~

Here's to fighting the good fight.

T fell asleep while holding one eye open.

The boys were watching one of the Star Wars movies for the 500 billionth time. I decided to check on them since it was getting close to bedtime. I found him on the very edge of the chair. I thought he was awake at first and asked him something. When I didn't get a response I moved in closer and that's when i realized he was sleeping. Silly boy.

~*Mrs. Fun*~

Wanting sucks...

I don't ever really want anything..I don't buy clothes or shoes very often. If I do it's always on clearance. I NEVER buy anything for the house that isn't needed.
So when I want something and know I can't have it it makes me pouty and sad.
Blu is having a sale and the website I want is only $100 plus $100 to host with them for a year. It's usually $400 plus the $100.
I started brain storming ways I could get this money. Even if I did come up with it there are other things that are needed more like shoes and clothes for the kids. So I am blogging about it in hopes to put this behind me.
I am going to pout until the sale ends tomorrow and then move on with my life.

~*Mrs. Fun*~

No more babies

Spent the day out and about. We didn't even take the stroller. It was great!! No diapers, no sippy cups, no snacks and no stroller. Life is good.
We rented Knocked Up last night and it made a little part of me want another baby. Just a little part. I am hoping that that little part of me goes away completely soon.

I love Greys

So I took this quiz and it was fun.

I was Callie.....
People are often intimidated by you; you're like a force of nature: strong, independent and a damn good dancer. You hide your vulnerable side under wisecracks but you bleed just like everyone else. It's okay to let people know that every now and then.

Not sure I'm a good dancer but the rest is pretty much right on.

Summer is here...

I am so excited!! It seems summers are getting shorter and the school year longer. So by the time the end of the year comes I am so happy for it to be over. No more homework battles, no more finding socks and shoes in the morning and no more making lunches until lunchtime!!

I do wish that summers for my kids were more like the ones I had as a kid. I remember hopping on my bike after breakfast and not returning home until lunch. Then I was back out again until dinner.
I don't feel comfortable letting my kids play in the driveway without adult supervision. Forget riding their bikes around the neighborhood or to a friends house. There's also the fact that we live where it gets up to 115 degrees on any given day in the summer.

So heres to SUMMER!!

Mothers Day 2008

I am one lucky mama. I have four healthy and smart children that really do love me, LOL!! Sometimes the two middle boys have a weird way of showing it but that's okay.
I got to sleep in today. I awoke to donuts and coffee. The best!! Ever since I haven't felt good though. My stomach is slightly off and my muscles ache. Hoping by bedtime I will feel better. I rented the movie Juno. Tried to watch it this afternoon...BAD idea. The kids were in and out of the room and of course they walk in as they show a condom going onto a banana....turned it off after that. Hopefully they won't talk about it at school tomorrow...heres to hoping.

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there.

So here it goes..

I am starting over. I have an awesome blog on my own domain using wordpress but it's getting too complicated for me . I am also running out of room on my server. So this is just easier. For now. Who knows if i'll even keep it up. I have a lot to say though, lol.

I am mom of 4 wonderful children, a photographer on the side and married to Mr. Fun for 12 years now....LOVE him.